What Love Isn’t

Now that it is December, holiday season is in full swing here!  The only thing missing is the snow.  But, it’s Michigan so if we just wait another second there will be plenty!

Having to spend lots of time with extended family is a challenge…well, not for me; my family is PERFECT.

But for many, it has its challenges.  The uncle who voted for Trump.  The grandma who voted for Clinton (both of them).  The cousin who never does the dishes and falls asleep watching the Lion’s game. Then, wakes up the minute you change the channel to watch the much more entertaining Packer’s game.  And, of course the brother-in-law who always stirs the pot enough to start a fight and then packs up his family and heads home…three states away.  As you can see, it can be quite the challenge!

Seriously, though have they never read the Bible.

I Corinthians 13.  That’s all I’m sayin’…


Love is.

Patient.  Kind.  And, all those other things too!

So, I have been thinking about the “love chapter” a lot this week.  And, I will be the first to admit I am really, REALLY quick to remind the people around me what love is NOT.

When someone makes holiday plans and just expects me to drop everything and be there when they say without asking if it works for me.  Well, love isn’t bossy is it?

Or, if a person cuts me off in traffic, or in front of me at Starbucks.  Well, love isn’t that pushy is it?

And, when I see someone on a certain social media platform racing to condemn a person, place, or thing without a second thought, or pause, or listen.  Hmm, love is definitely not so quick judge; right?

uh. oh.


Big, giant, in my face…


You see in my haste to point out what love is NOT I have most assuredly forgotten what love IS.  And, I have failed in living out the definition of this highly esteemed word that I seem insistent everyone ELSE is forgetting!

Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.  Love never ends.

I am sure you recognize those words up there.  And, they are not mine.  They are His.  Those words need to stop me mid-thought, mid-post, mid-shout and bring me back into focus.  The love that I have been given far outweighs any of the love I could ever display. And, I know I will and have failed.  But, just because I fail doesn’t mean I stop trying or stop remembering.

I will choose happy this holiday season (in the midst of family chaos, shopping disasters, and in spite of social media),  because faith, hope, and love abide, these three; but the greatest of these is love. 







White Noise

My husband snores!  And I don’t mean like a cute little see-saw noise as he peacefully sleeps next to me dreaming of our wonderful life together snoring.  I mean wake the dead, shake the rooftops, I think I may smother him while he sleeps so I can at least get an hour of peace and quiet snoring!  It has been kind of an issue.  Especially recently, because since we have had kids, I am the lightest sleeper on earth.  I swear, I can hear Jaden breathing across the hall and know when the girls roll over in their beds next door.  Needless to say, we needed to figure something out so that this wife and momma did not have murder on her mind most days! Well, not really, but…..okay, maybe REALLY!!!


So we went to Target (oh, how I love Target) and purchased a fan.  And not just a tiny, little, out-of-the-way, feels like someone is blowing on you fan, we bought the biggest and loudest fan we could find.  I mean, this fan took up the corner of our room and made so much noise you probably could have broken into our house, had a party, cleaned up, and in the morning we wouldn’t even have a clue!  This fan was a thing of miracles; I could sleep through the snoring and was a happy girl again!  All I needed was some white noise to drown out the distraction of the most annoying sound ever heard by human ears.

White noise is like that, right?!  It camouflages the sounds around us so we can focus on the task at hand.  Whether it’s sleeping, studying, or just trying to make sense of our thoughts we all need some white noise once in awhile.  Of course, it can be a little bit of a bad thing too.  The noise of the TV at dinner distracts us from learning the details of the day.  The noise from the radio in the car keeps us from connecting with our spouse, even though it’s the first time in weeks we have had more than five minutes alone.  The noise of busy schedules and responsibility keep us distracted from what is most important: being a family.

And then, sometimes the noise of WHAT my heart wants drowns out the one WHO my heart needs.

Be encouraged today because no matter how much you and I think we need the white noise (because I do, I REALLY do) there is always that quiet voice that manages to make itself known in the midst of the distraction. The voice of the One loves you at your lowest.  The voice of the One who gives when we don’t deserve it.  The voice of the One who wants your heart to be filled with the white noise that is His grace.